Thinking About Thinking

The thought occurred to me recently that I like to think. Furthermore, I like to think about thinking [metacognition]. My ability to do this is an integral part of my humanity. Perhaps that is why I find it so appealing. I like thinking so much that I decided to research the ‘idea’. It turns out that a lot of people … intelligent people … have been thinking about thinking for a very long time. I learned (although I think I already knew) that there are many different kinds of thinking – critical thinking, creative and innovative thinking, purposive-kinetic thinking, meditative thinking (a favorite of mine), and hyper-alert instinctive thinking. Who would have thought there were so many ways to think?

But this is a blog about gifted parenting and the children they parent. I've come to the conclusion that teaching gifted students how to think more effectively is the most important thing we can teach them. It provides fuel for their insatiable curiosity. It trumps subject matter, job training, gym class, and learning how to select color coordinated outfits for the first day of school. By encouraging gifted children to think and providing them with an environment conducive to good thinking, we help them to fulfill their potential as leaders, problem-solvers and decision-makers.

Teaching any type of thinking seems to go in and out of fashion more often than mini-skirts. But, it’s no laughing matter. It is, in fact, critical that we encourage critical thought. Parents play an important role in this facet of their child’s education. Some would argue that critical thought is second-nature to gifted children. It may be for some, but our society has de-valued the need for it in many insidious (classroom inclusion comes to mind) ways and our children will suffer the consequences.

So, where did the idea of critical thinking come from? Most people would agree that Socrates had a lot to do with it. He loved to ask questions! In fact, it was his fellow Greeks that gave us the word ‘critical’ – kritikos – being able to discern or judge. Socratic questioning can be used to develop critical thought because it seeks a depth of understanding in a systematic way while considering the plausibility and truthfulness of the answers being sought. In 1605, Sir Francis Bacon defined critical thinking as a “desire to seek, patience to doubt, fondness to meditate, slowness to assert, readiness to consider, carefulness to dispose and set in order; and hatred for every kind of imposture [fraud].” I think he summarized it quite nicely.

In her article, (Roeper Review, August 1994), Stephanie Tolan writes, “Our relentless focus on achievement rather than the unusual mental processing that constitutes giftedness makes the necessary recognition and understanding difficult if not impossible for many.” She goes on to say, “… it is in childhood that the gifted individual begins to form that critical sense of self, his initial understanding of his own mental processing, his own mind.” This speaks to the crux of the matter – gifted children have a unique capacity for critical thinking.

“… it is in childhood that the gifted individual begins to form that critical sense of self, his initial understanding of his own mental processing, his own mind.”


Why don’t many of our schools teach critical thinking? Critical thinkers have a knack for challenging the status quo. And the status quo likes things just the way they are. It can be difficult to control a thinking populace. Another consideration to keep in mind is that teachers of critical thinking really need to know what they’re talking about! It’s one thing to teach ‘out of the book’ … something administrators continually stress to their faculty as a good thing … it’s quite another thing to reach outside the box! Finally, critical thinkers are truth seekers and what constitutes ‘truth’ these days has been marred by charlatans posing as media experts and politicians as well.

Zoe Burgess, in a recent blog post, asked the question, “?” She provides excellent suggestions for how critical thinking can be taught and cultivated through modeling by the teacher, project-based learning, cross-curriculum teaching, and service learning. Assessing this type of learning requires the teacher to move out of their comfort zone. One must possess the ability to pose questions of students which will allow them to demonstrate their depth of understanding.

As the parent of a gifted student, where do you start? Provide your child with a place to think; an area with resources to aid in thinking. Encourage them to get rest and provide a healthy diet. Value their independent thinking through discussion and listening to your child. Prompt their thinking through Socratic questioning. In their book, , Drs. Richard Paul and Linda Elder list 9 strategies that students can use themselves to develop critical thinking. The full list can be found . They include using wasted time, keeping an intellectual journal, and by redefining the way one thinks about oneself. Good advice for students and parents alike!

Emotional Intensity – A Preview

As parents of gifted children, we have all experienced emotional intensity – theirs and ours. It can be a positive experience, but far too often it becomes a frustrating one. These are the times that try parents’ souls.

“They don’t come with an instruction manual!” How many times have you heard that phrase? Today, parenting guides are a dime-a-dozen. However, they offer little help or hope to frazzled parents of gifted children.

Enter Christine Fonseca’s new book, Emotional Intensity in Gifted Students: Helping Kids Cope with Explosive Feelings. Wow! How I wish I had known and understood the concept of emotional intensity and its implications for gifted students and their parents when my kids were younger. Would I have reacted differently to their outbursts (and mine)? You betcha! Do I have regrets? Some. Will reading this book cause an ‘attitude adjustment’ on my part? Most likely.

To be honest, I have only read the first chapter of this book as it was just released yesterday. You can read it at  . The First Stop on the Blog Tour for Emotional Intensity can be found at author Michelle McLean’s Blog (Chance to win a free copy of the book with blog comment through October 8th!) Another interview with Christine can be found at . The book can be ordered from the publisher, Prufrock Press, (currently out of stock at Amazon).

You can be sure that I’ll have more to say once I finish reading the book! Stay tuned …

Things TED Taught Me … About Gifted Advocacy!

I’m a recent convert to TED talks. And a recent talk ‘caught my eye’. Chris Anderson, one of the suits at TED, presented a talk about global innovation and it exponential growth as the result of video becoming more widely viewed due to the expansion of bandwidth accessibility around the world.

I watched it once. Then I printed out (I know, old school) the transcript. Then I watched it again; and again; and again. My mind seemed to be racing! I felt like that old episode of Outer Limits where the scientists’ heads begin to look like cone-heads and they grow a sixth finger. The premise of ever-accelerating human innovation was certainly appealing, but that wasn’t what I was thinking about …

I was thinking about all the ramifications this talk had for gifted education and our gifted children. Certainly the world stands to benefit from this technology, but for the gifted … it’s like empowerment³!

“Crowd-accelerated innovation” depends on a crowd, a light shown on that crowd to illuminate the most capable people in the crowd, and desire. In the past, it took years for innovators to be recognized and then to have their creations supported and distributed. Enter the Internet. Someone, perhaps your gifted child, has an idea and decides to make a video for You Tube. People view it … rate it, comment on it, link to it, tweet it, share it on Facebook. You get the idea. Chris Anderson called it ‘global recognition’. Suddenly, a crowd forms … on online community … and collaboration begins. As the crowd grows, the idea is shared, revised, and innovation occurs. The world is a better place.

The same could be said for gifted advocacy. One parent (@DeborahMersino) had an idea. She had seen the growth of a community of educators on Twitter. She decided to try moderating her own chat on Twitter for gifted education. Within weeks and then months, that one idea had grown into a global community! Parents, educators, advocates, consultants, and school psychologists were collaborating online around the world and around the clock on how to best advocate for our gifted children. And a funny thing happened on the way to the chat … they were discovering that what had once been thought of as isolated incidents surrounding various groups of gifted children were really a global phenomenon. Familiarity was breeding friendships and new approaches! Groups began to form on Facebook; encompassing the Global #gtchat group. And this was just the beginning, folks.

What about educating gifted kids? Story after story was related through various social media outlets by frustrated parents who seemed to be always headed to the next battle with school districts pleading for help for their gifted child. More often than not, the response was always the same … not enough resources, no interest in professional development for teachers, myth-filled excuses as to why gifted children could make it on their own. Yada, yada, yada.

Ah… but the newly developed video resources that were found on the Internet became game changers in the world of education. Forget lousy online classes that were simply a redo of correspondence courses from years past. Now, gifted students can sit in a classroom with a gifted facilitator or at home on their own computer and be taught by a world class educator face to face in real time. Location is no longer a concern. Ability grouping is automatic. Age is no longer a factor as students progress at their own pace. The cost of a college education can become affordable again (although someone will find a way to limit this, no doubt). Crowds begin to form. Light shines on the crowd. The desire to learn and innovate grows. The role of student and teacher blend into the beginning of a new type of learning from each other. History is changed forever.

This may sound like a pipe dream to some or the beginning of just another utopian novel, but the fact of the matter is that this is already happening and gifted children are standing on the precipice of a new day in their own education.

I will include a link to the TED talk for your viewing pleasure. I hope that it excites you as much as it did me. Perhaps you will gain insights that I have missed. I look forward to your comments!

Link -

To Group or Not to Group … That Is No Longer the Question!

Educational theories come and go. It’s a fact of life. We always hope that things are improving, but that is not the case when it comes to grouping students by ability. The dreaded ‘tracking’ misnomer is always drug out by opponents to this policy. But like it or not, ability grouping must be reconsidered. The sooner, the better. It doesn’t have to upset the entire system; just apply it to gifted students and case closed.

Why am I being so flippant about this? Because ability grouping already exists in our schools and society today for lots of other groups and I hear no complaints about them. We ability group athletes. The best players are on the starting line-up and everyone else sits on the bench. Start mediocre players and the fans would go wild! The coach would be gone before the end of the season. We ability group musicians in high school bands and orchestras. Students perform rigorous tests to gain the coveted ‘first chair’.

So, exactly what is ability grouping in relation to gifted education and why should you care? Simply stated it is the grouping and regrouping of students according to their present level of performance. It can reach across the curriculum or be applied to just one subject. It works, gifted students are happier and perform better, and regular ed teachers are free to spend more time with their other students. Win, win, win! Contrary to the popular belief that it fosters elitism, the opposite is actually true. The regular classroom is free of those students who always raise their hands first, always get the A’s, and always seem to be the ‘teacher’s pet’.

And consider this … how many regular ed parents would tolerate their children being placed in special education classes just so ‘those’ kids didn’t feel left out? That is exactly how a gifted student often feels in the regular classroom. And what does this say for ‘appropriate education’? Year after year of being forced to sit in classes covering material they already know. Year after year of being told not to work ahead, pay attention or worse … being told they are wrong when in fact they actually know the material better than the teacher. These students need to work in peer groups, engage in competitive learning situations, and be allowed to work independently.

The outcry of education reformers to stop the emphasis on standardized testing and placing so much value on test scores grows louder every day. This message holds special meaning for the gifted community. Most gifted students ‘top out’ on these tests and they don’t need to prove they’re smart. Why not tap their abilities by developing higher level thinking skills, contemplating solutions for complex problems, and encouraging them to work on global issues?

Do not be fooled by the rhetoric that everyone can achieve at the same level. It doesn’t happen, and it will prove to be more harmful to our society if we continue to turn a blind eye to the needs of our gifted students. These students must be allowed to soar as high as their abilities permit. They are humanity’s best hope for a better tomorrow.

Personal Note

Every once in a while, the consultant needs to seek advice (as well as solace). Although I am currently working on a new post, life has thrown some unexpected challenges my way as a gifted parent and my writing has been severely curtailed.

I have mentioned this before, but I've been very fortunate to find someone who coaches parents of gifted children. Her website can be found at  . Some of the services include: developing parenting strategies that work for your children and honor who you are; support for the educational issues you face, including the identification process for your gifted children and making school choices; and overcoming the “Imposter Syndrome” and owning your giftedness.

When those times come that you just don't feel you can handle alone, please consider contacting DeepWatersCoach. It can make all the difference in the world!

Personal Branding and Your Gifted Student

A mention of student branding in a recent blog post brought sharp criticism from one reader. It took me by surprise. It became the only comment that I’ve not posted to date. Not because it was critical, but because I thought it was so off the mark. I’ve been contemplating a response ever since.

We live in the 21st century; well, at least most of us do. Like it or not, social media is here to stay and its influence on our lives will only continue to grow. How well we and our children interact with this new media will have a profound impact on how we view others and how they view us. Creating a self-designed image that portrays an accurate picture of oneself can only be done through a process of self-reflection. I like to refer to this as the Polonius factor … ‘to thine own self be true’. Projection and refinement throughout life will one day become second nature.

There are many reasons why a parent should guide their child through this process. Perhaps the most important consideration is that if you don’t do your own branding, someone else will. The reader who found my suggestion so abhorrent seemed to think that branding meant creating a ‘cookie cutter’ image of oneself in order to impress colleges and university admission officers. Nothing could be further from the truth. Truth, in fact, is the most critical part of personal branding. Creating a false image will only result in harming future job prospects and interpersonal relationships. In essence, we are returning to the days of Protagoras, Socrates, and Aristotle when introspection was thought to enrich one’s life, encourage goal setting, and ultimately aid in accomplishing those goals.

Personal branding is a process that may begin any time, but usually not until the teen years. Gifted students will probably begin to ask the pertinent questions such as what are my strengths, my weaknesses, my passions, and my goals sooner than their age-peers. The answers to these questions will help your child begin to formulate the direction they want their life to take; a.k.a., “what do I want to be when I grow up?” This should culminate in the formation of a plan to accomplish goals set during the branding process, and allow for positive steps to be taken to meet these goals.

And what about social media? Through outlets such as Facebook and Twitter, students begin to develop networks of people who share their interests, values, and goals. Connecting with people they meet in school, at camps and conferences, or at social events, and developing relationships can reap many benefits in an increasingly disconnected world. Instead of restricting access to these networks out of fear of what might happen, parents are in the unique position of helping their children to become responsible digital citizens as well as informed citizens who can interact objectively online. Through responsible parenting, you can gain their respect and trust as you act as their personal guidance counselor and partner with them to understand the Internet and how it will affect their lives.

Whether you are a young parent or an older parent, educate yourself about social media and personal branding. Guide your child in a direction that reflects the values you hope to instill in them. It is a brave new world out there and they will thank you one day for being there with them to ensure that their world reflects utopia rather than dystopia.

Working with Your Gifted Child’s Teacher

I have a dear friend in Ireland whom I met through Twitter because we were both mothers of gifted children and shared a sense that we could make the world a better place by sharing our experiences about what we have learned throughout their lifetimes. Recently, she wrote a blog  concerning how her relationships with her children’s teachers affected their time in school. It made me begin to think of similar experiences I have had with my children's teachers.

I am not a teacher. My background  in sociology and experience as a parent have taught me that parent-teacher relationships are critical to the quality of education your child receives in school. It’s like a symbiotic relationship cubed. I am a firm believer in the “it takes a village to raise a child” approach to parenting.

Teachers can be difficult when dealing with gifted children. I have witnessed it in the classroom and have experienced it as a parent. However, parents can also be insensitive in the manner in which they approach teachers. It doesn't have to be this way.

I’d like to offer a few suggestions to parents to help you improve your relationship with your child’s teachers. First, remember that teachers are human, too; they have feelings that can be bruised and can react just like anyone else. Second, when it comes to gifted education, very few teachers have had any exposure to it while in college or subsequently through professional development. This is a worldwide problem in gifted education.

When you first meet a teacher, don’t assume that they are experts in every facet of education. Your first experience probably involved an elementary teacher soon after your child was identified as gifted. Your initial reaction was to learn everything you could about what it meant for your child to be gifted. Do not assume that this is the teacher's top priority.

Unless your child is fortunate enough to enroll in a program specifically designed for gifted children, his or her regular education teacher will be under many demands that you do not even realize. In today's world, the pressure to get all students to proficient on standardized tests can overwhelm a teacher. Budget cuts to education only make matters worse. Increased class sizes, supply shortages that often fall on the teacher's shoulders and student behavior which has been on a downward spiral for over a generation can take their toll on a teacher.

Enter the new gifted parent. I want my child accelerated. My child’s needs aren't being met. Why can’t you provide differentiated instruction? My child is bored in your class. Get the picture? Right away, the teacher is put on the defensive. They may agree with you, but certainly don’t feel like facing demands before they get to know your child.

Share your child’s educational and developmental history, and provide the teacher with information you have found concerning gifted education. Their response to your efforts will be a good indicator as to their willingness to work with you. If they respond negatively, it may be time to look for other alternatives.

Is this your job? No, but a little bit of understanding can go along way in building a positive relationship with the teacher. Will every teacher respond to this approach? Absolutely not. But making the effort could make all the difference for your child and that is what is most important.

I have found it invaluable to get involved with gifted advocacy. Organize parents and meet with each other not only to advocate for gifted education, but to also support one another. Bring teachers and gifted administrators into your group. Express your desire to work together. Join state and national advocacy groups and educate yourself. Become a resource for the teacher rather than an adversary. Learn about what other school districts in your area offer in regard to gifted opportunities. By networking, parents can often enlighten educators as to what is available.

It is possible for you and your child’s teacher to work together. Developing a relationship based on mutual respect can go a long way. If that relationship does not develop, consider other educational options for your child. At the end of the day, your child's well-being must be the main consideration.

Returning Creativity and Innovation to America’s Classrooms

It’s been nearly 20 years since Americans started facing the fact that other countries’ students were out-performing their students in the classroom and on standardized tests. In subsequent years, the results have gotten worse … much worse. What has happened to creativity and innovation … once thought to be hallmarks of U.S. education? After years of pouring in billions of dollars and re-vamping the educational system numerous times, Americans and their politicians seem to be mystified as to why things aren’t getting better.

Well, I can think of a few reasons why. How about teaching students ‘how’ to take tests and score better does not make for better students. And when kids spend the majority of their time in school taking tests, there’s precious little time for actual teaching. Or, why didn’t anyone consider looking at the educational systems in those countries that were doing better to understand what they were doing to promote learning and analytical thinking. Who in authority truly understood the endgame? I’d say it was a perfect storm from my point of view.

Test scores can improve, for a while, if the student only has to memorize answers and then recall them for tests. But, what if the student could ‘figure out’ the answer without having seen the question before? What about those ‘aha’ moments as referenced by Jan and Bob Davidson in Genius Denied? Why do the answers to these questions seem to confound educational policy wonks? And how great of a role does politics play in the nation’s education policy? Answer those questions and you’ll soon realize why we’re in the mess we’re in!

So, what does this have to do with gifted education? It has a lot to do with it! Why do we ignore at best and obstruct at worst the educational needs of our best and brightest? This speaks volumes to why the U.S. educational system is in such disarray! Being smart or even aspiring to have the answers is demonized in our society. In countries that far out-score our students, intelligence is valued and nurtured; not categorized as elitism. Why do Americans rationalize giving athletes full scholarships to play games in college and hedge on providing the same benefits to their best performing academic scholars?

Creativity and innovation are never going to be found lurking in the corners of classrooms that are being pushed to make Annual Yearly Progress targets. Schools will continue to be places where students have to go to; not want to go to. Things will never change until those in a position to legislate the changes are persuaded to consider what is really at stake.

Globalization isn’t going away. Everyone must finally understand the risk involved in ignoring the unmet needs of gifted students. Highly-abled students are being forced to seek out educational platforms that meet their needs; wherever they exist. Technology will provide the conduit and intelligence the way. We face a crossroads. Which direction we take will decide the future standing of our nation on the world stage. It’s time for America to return creativity and innovation to our classrooms.

Enjoy Your Gifted Child

Today, I thought about this blog. And I said to myself, “you have had too many posts about the difficulties associated with raising gifted children”. Maybe that’s because parents usually come to me when they are having a problem. But I’m here to tell you that it is a lot of fun to raise a gifted child! I know because I’ve raised two of them.

When they are born, they are pretty cute. Wrinkly, but cute. However, I swear there is that glint in their eye that says, “Are you ready for me?” It can be a bit unnerving to say the least. The first time you don’t really pay attention. The next time … it’s like, “here we go again!”

Most new parents wish their child came with an instruction manual. Gifted parents hope for an encyclopedia! Nothing seems to go as planned. Scheduled milestones often whiz right by you. One day your baby may be cooing; the next day asking you for flavored milk in their bottle. You soon realize that they are ‘listening’ to your conversations and preparing a rebuttal.

This may disturb some people, but I think it’s wonderful. I never believed in ‘baby talk’; no matter what the parenting books said. And why would I? Gifted kids are usually what I like to call, ‘early adapters’. Sure, each one is different, but they have a way of surprising the hell out of you when you least expect it. When someone tells you to stop and smell the roses, you better be prepared to smell the entire florist shop when your child is gifted!

Don’t think I’m delusional or the parent of perfect children. I am neither. But I have learned a lot these past 19 years and the most important thing may be that all the arguments with school officials or baseball coaches will fade in time. It’s the happy moments that remain. The time your 5 year old climbed in bed with you to discuss what Einstein meant with his theory about light and energy. Or perhaps when your preteen expressed doubts about the existence of god. Or when your teenager stood in front of their graduating class to give a speech of reflection and hope.

It is easy to become overwhelmed by a precocious child or even a child who in time is smarter than you and for whom you don’t have all the answers. In the old days they were called ‘a handful’. And sometimes you will need to cry yourself to sleep. It happens. But try to keep your ‘eye on the prize’! They grow up and become incredibly gifted adults; someone you ‘want’ to talk to. There’s nothing like intelligent conversation with your own offspring.

Here’s a thought to consider when you’ve had a bad day. That child who just spilt part of their science project on your new kitchen floor has the potential to one day change the world or be the one person to solve a medical mystery or be the arbiter of peace in a remote part of the globe. Not all parents are so privileged or blessed.

So … enjoy your child with all their idiosyncrasies and nerdiness and back-talking. They will probably take the road less traveled, but you will have the satisfaction of knowing that you were a part of their journey!

Why Social Media Integration is Important to Gifted Education

Actually, social media integration is important to all education in the 21st century! Why should parents of gifted children care about this? Probably because it’s the best thing to come along in five hundred years … I’m thinking Gutenberg here!

For many years, gifted parents have fought to have specialized instruction for their children. They have offered up about a million different suggestions on how schools could adequately support their children’s needs. Too expensive. Not enough staff. Resource allocation must consider the majority of students in the class. No time to train teachers. You know the story.

Well, now there is a way to educate your child in ways unimaginable only a decade ago. Although the platform is firmly planted on the Internet – it is only a means to an end. An individualized education plan that will reduce costs to your school district and prepare your child for a future world that we can’t even fathom at the moment is the goal. However, the obstacles have not changed – backward looking administrators and school boards who fear the unknown, but I hope to give you some ammunition for your arguments … and boy does $$$$ TALK!

Utilizing social media in your school is an inexpensive , cost-effective means of delivering course content, building global communities, raising social and environmental consciousness, radically raising the level of motivation and interest in school, reducing the need to maintain expansive campuses or to continually purchase expensive textbooks that become irrelevant before they leave the publisher, pairs great educators with great students, prepares students to utilize emerging technologies, and reduce the incidences of physical bullying. How’s that for starters!

And now the rest of the story … Twitter can serve as a 24/7 source of professional development resource for teachers. Facebook pages for specific classes can allow teachers to communicate with students and parents, student to student discussions and collaborations, and interaction with students all over the world. University level courses can be delivered over the Internet in real-time, face-to-face, by college professors to unlimited numbers of students with the assistance of services such as Skype. No more lectures-on-a-disk with reliance on emails and static bulletin boards. Social media can also enhance the educational experiences of disabled students for who brick and mortar schools often means endless barriers. It can provide opportunities for students in rural school districts and remote areas without nearby schools.

Gifted parents must be flexible and willing to consider using all types of available technology to ensure their children receive a world class education without all the expense of traditional schools. Gifted students must lead the way on getting social media integrated into their schools. As their needs are met, it will open up possibilities for other students within their school districts. Finally, an avenue to the future that is right in plain view and attainable today!